


We Don't Talk About Meg

by Graphite_crumble



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Gen, Megstiel - Freeform, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-23
Updated: 2014-09-23
Packaged: 2018-02-18 12:26:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2348420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Graphite_crumble/pseuds/Graphite_crumble
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Short. The Winchesters have a new rule, as Castiel deals with his loss.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Don't Talk About Meg

**Author's Note:**

> This story starts halfway through an argument between Sam and Dean, with Castiel present.

“Yeah, because trusting demons is always a great idea.” scoffed Dean. “When hasn’t that bit us in the ass?”

“Well, there was Meg.” Sam replied. He quickly realised his mistake. Dean and Sam’s expressions instantly changed from anger to ‘oh crap’ and they both looked over at Castiel. “I’m sorry, Cas, I didn’t think…”

“It’s fine.” Cas said curtly.

“Cas, man, you know if you ever want to talk about it…” Dean began.

The Angel vanished.

“Great. Good Job, Sam!”

***

Castiel stood in the dark and grimy corridor, his eyes playing over the cracks in the walls plaster, trying to discern his feelings.

The compound was a dismal place, but he kept coming back here. This was the spot where she’d first kissed him, her corrupted soul piercing little holes in his grace. He’d kissed her back, though he hardly knew why. That had been the start of it. Thoughts. Feelings. Absurdly human emotions.

Her time as his carer had only made the feelings stronger. He had been weakened, addled by the torment he’d lifted from Sam Winchester’s mind, but she’d never used it to her advantage. She’d never betrayed him, or sold him out. She’d read to him, in his calmer moments, and held him when his hellish visions reduced him to a tearful, screaming, mess. Castiel was sure he wouldn’t have made it through the madness without her.

“Meg.” Cas whispered her name to himself. The name was a lie, of course, stolen from a previous vessel. He’d often wondered what her true name was, and the name of the human she’d once been, long ago. He supposed it didn’t really matter. He knew her as Meg, and that would have to be good enough.

Castiel wasn’t entirely sure why he couldn’t bear to hear others speak her name. He only knew it hurt. He felt grief, and regret, and guilt. He’d left her to die, too consumed by his mission to think of anything but the tablet he’d carried away.

Something wet rolled down his cheek and he mopped his face with the sleeve of his coat. An Angel shedding tears for a demon. It was a good thing his brothers and sisters couldn’t see him. He had a new family now. One that understood, even if he couldn’t bring himself to speak about it.

He cocked his head to one side, listening to the Winchesters argue, several states away.

“You know the rule, Sam.” Dean was saying. “We don’t talk about Meg!”


End file.
